How It Works

I’ve learned over the years that to resolve conflict in real ways, with permanent effects, you need to focus on these four key elements:

  • 1. How To Deal Effectively With Emotion – The Other Person’s And Your Own.

    Emotion arises naturally whenever there is conflict – it’s a natural and healthy signal that something needs attention.

    But you can’t resolve a conflict effectively when you, your partner or your child is in the grip of strong emotion. You need to defuse the situation first. I teach you how to do that for yourself, and how to help the other person do that, whether it is your partner, your child, or someone at work.

  • 2. Timing: What To Say When (And What Not To Say)

    There is a natural path to resolving conflict peacefully and effectively. When you follow it things get resolved much more quickly and easily.

    Without it – well, you may end up with an issue that lingers unresolved for years. Or, resolving it ends up consuming far more time, energy and goodwill than necessary – precious time that could have been spent enjoying being with the people you love.

    I give you a “roadmap” of the steps on the peaceful and effective path to conflict resolution. You’ll also learn how to tell which step you and the other person are on, and what to say (and not say) at each step – to keep the conversation moving toward a solution that really works.

  • 3. How To Find Solutions That Work For Everyone

    You know that the solution you come up with also has to work for the other person or they won’t follow through on it. But how do you do that without giving up on what you need and want?

    You have to find and learn a process that is consistent, repeatable, and usable even under stress to identify solutions that work for all, even when it seems impossible. It’s a tall order, but it does exist, and it’s critical.

  • 4. How To Make It All Feel So Comfortable And Natural To You And Your Family That You’ll Actually Use It

    It is one thing to understand what you need to do in a conflict situation. It is much more difficult to actually do it. And it’s important that it not come across as a “technique” so that you don’t further harm your relationship by seeming artificial or inauthentic.

    The easiest way to do this is to identify the essential skills and break them down into a series of small changes, so they can be slipped naturally into everyday conversations.

    This helps to reinforce them, because each small change brings small but significant benefits immediately. As you continue to add them in, it feels more and more natural, and your effectiveness can grow from there.

When you learn, integrate and apply these four keys, conflicts start to resolve themselves.

Instead of struggling for days (or months, or years…), some conflicts can be resolved in moments, others in a relatively short, focused conversation. And because you’re building a foundation of trust and understanding, relationships become warmer and conflict arises less in the first place.

Want to know more?

1. Talk to Me

Book a time to talk with me about your unique situation.

2. Download The 3 Keys Handbook

Download my free The 3 Keys to Resolving Issues with Your Partner or Children handbook.

3. Meet Glenda

If you’d like to know more about me and how I came to do this work please view my bio.